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"Last place finish - First
place attitude" - Dave's Story After 7 months of training, I completed a triathlon to support the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society in Hyannis on Saturday. An extensive Google search revealed my name listed on the below website showing the results.
http://www.coolrunning.com/results/04/ma/Jun12_NETTHy_set1.shtml
Upon scrolling to the bottom, I came to the conclusion that I finished in, roughly, last place. I first suspected I finished last when I heard a song prominently featuring the words "Last Time" playing as I crossed the finish line. (This actually did happen). I have never heard of this song but the meaning was clear. I would have preferred hearing "Eye of the Tiger" or "Theme from Greatest American Hero." Even "Hard to Say I'm Sorry" would have been better. I regret that the truck carrying the volunteers had driven past me! Here are the factors that I believe impacted my time:
1. Always looking out for the public interest, halfway through the swimming portion, I stopped to say hello to a strategically chosen female lifeguard on a surfboard who looked lonely.
2. I performed a similar public service during the running (a.k.a., "walking") portion of the event. The individuals handing out water on the side of the road seemed in desperate need of company.
3. I was intrigued by a golf match along the bike route.
4. My wetsuit fit my frame like O.J.’s glove and it was unpleasant, and time consuming, trying to peel it off at the “transition.” Not a particularly attractive sight. Next time, I think I will follow the recommendations and try it on when they give it to me, instead of the day before the event when it is too late to request a larger suit.
5. To get the full effect of the triathlon’s behind the scenes activities, I decided that I wanted to finish in time to watch volunteers break down the last bike rack after most riders were long gone.
6. I did not want to wait in a long line for Brigham’s Ice Cream after the event -- which would have happened if I followed the "will of the majority." I knew that unless I won or finished last, I would have to stand in a long line. (I also did not want to use a spoon for my ice cream so I thought it best to wait until I knew all the spoons would be long gone).
7. I think most of the other competitors probably could cite more than “watching Baywatch” as their previous swimming experience.
8. The wheels on my bike appear to know about the "O'Reilly Factor." They seemed to enter a "No SPIN Zone" without saying "Caution" to its rider. But now that I know I can, one, complete the course without committing any (flagrant) violations of the rules and regulations and, two, do it in under 6 hours, I will take the liberty of inviting folks down to watch next year (provided gas prices are affordable on the date of the event).
On a serious note, because of your support, I raised over $3,000 for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. For those of you who have already contributed, I really appreciate your support. I don't trace where this money goes, but I certainly think that the mission is a good one. I am also certain that they have made medical advances (at least for one person) since 2000.
-David
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